So took some pics today of myself and my husband so we can start to document the journey. If I wasn’t a tough broad I’d be crying my eyes out.
I have lost 7 poundss on pre-op which I have NEVER before been able to do in a week. So I’m feeling pretty good about myself, right? Fix my hair and my makeup and I’m all like, wow, I’m looking better! Because in my head, I’m a skinny person I guess.
But in fact, I’m not skinny of course.
We take these pictures with clothes and then just with undies. Can I just say…I look soooo unattractive to myself! I look fat, and out of shape, and blobby. All of which I am, but seeing a picture of me made it a lot more real than looking at myself in the mirror, not sure why. I have a friend who used to say he needed to lose weight and when we told him he looked fine, he always joked, “You only say that because you haven’t seen me naked”. Today, I know exactly what he meant.
And it also looks like I’ve been that woman who wears too-tight bras without even knowing it. My husband took back pictures of me and I was like, I’m surprised my bras just haven’t cut me in half all these years! Maybe if I’d taken more pics of myself it would have pushed me into surgery sooner!
I’m trying not to obsess about it and just remember that THIS is why I am getting the surgery. But really I cannot imagine EVERY posting pics of myself in undies for befores and afters. I hope I get there.